This is for You.

When I was young I was told that family would always stay and friends would leave.

So at a young age

I was thought that people come and go.

That the people you meet never stay

That family will be the only ones there for you

And I hated that thought as much as the next guy who was abused by his parents.

I abhorred the thought that the family I have will be with me forever.

But I can not disagree,

What they said was true.

People do come

…then they just leave.

Why do they leave?

Until at last I couldn’t take it anymore

I planned my escape.

Quite messily I might add.

But I had a procedure:

Step 1: Pick a canvas.

I chose my wrist and my thighs.

Step 2: Choose your paintbrush

I chose the sharpener.

Step 3: Choose how dark do you want your painting to be.

And the rest is just general cleaning.


Then she came

She drew me fantasies.

She created a space ship with my name on it and told me she’ll bring me to other galaxies.

She took me to the moon

She made me walk on water

Then she left

And all the fantasies became nightmares.

My skills of being an artist of the color red came back.

She left me, cold and unwanted.

She left me with a jar of broken dreams.

I’m never going to see other galaxies.

I’m never going to the moon.

I’m never going to walk on water.



But…you came and snuffed out the darkness in me.

Not entirely because the darkness will always be there,

But the light in your heart fought the darkness and won.

You carried me up



Into the ocean of clouds

You stared at me,

Your eyes full of love

You promised things that does not compare to the boundless sea

For as I read in a poem “for no such love and no such ocean will ever be”

What you promised was real.

You promised to take to the beach at sunset,

You promised to let me watch the stars.

You sang me to sleep,

Told me stories.

Held my hand through the nightmares.

You never gave up on me.

You showed me that people do stay

You told me that you can break the chains of this unwanted family bond.


My sweet, sweet darling

You are my answered prayer.

My one galaxy of stars,

My one true angel

I love you.


(To you, Loser)



This is my last poem,
My last letter,
To you.
This is the last time I will write about our used to be friendship.
This will be the last time I will write about our roller coaster ride.
This will be the last time I will write about our greatest downfall.
This is the last time.

This will be the last thing that you will read,
That will make you hear my voice in the background.
This will be the last thing the I will write,
That is about you.

This is not a feeble attempt to restore what we once had.
After all, everything is not always about you,
as it should have been all along.
Because everything was about you
And you
and nothing but you
miles and piles of
Not everything is about you anymore.
My world will not revolve around you anymore.
You were once my earth and I was the moon.
Things are different now.
I am still the moon
but you are now Pluto.

Im tired of crying over you.
Im tired of building walls because of you.
im tired of thinking about you
because once, you were my greatest strength
And my greatest weakness.
You are my greatest stranger.

This is the last time I will cry over our happy memories
This is the last time I will think of you as a happy memory. Because
of all the people that could have broken me
into a trillion pieces
you werent one of them.
But you became them.


This is the last time I will write about our friendship.